(Freebie!) Day 11 -Reclaiming Sacred Sovereignty: Creating Rituals Rooted in Authenticity, Not Obligation

Let's pause for a second. Feel into the beautiful space you've created. However it feels whether its, quiet, tender, strange, or peaceful. That space isn't a void. It's a sanctuary in waiting. We've spent days talking about what to take off the holiday menu:

Obligation

Guilt

Performance

Now, let's write a new menu. What gets to go on it?

Whatever brings you a sense of true presence, consent, and rest. That's the new sacred.

Let's explore what that can look like.

This is where we get to be architects instead of archaeologists. We’re not just digging up old pain. We’re drafting blueprints for something new. What if “sacred” didn’t mean obligatory, triggering, or performative? What if sacred simply meant: what makes you feel whole, safe, and truly present?

Forget the ghost of holidays past. Let’s summon the spirit of Possibility.

Dismantling the Old Altar: What “Sacred” Was vs. What It Can Be

In a lot of religious and family systems, “sacred” gets twisted. It becomes synonymous for immutable, unquestionable, and wracked with guilt. The sacred ritual is the one you must perform, with the right words, in the right posture, with the right people, no matter how it makes you feel.

Fuck that!!

Let’s build a new sacred practice rooted in a trinity that actually supports the life you deserve:

Consent. You choose it. You can change it. Full stop.

Rest. It replenishes you; it doesn’t deplete you.

Presence. It brings you into your body and the current moment, not into a flashback.

The sacred isn’t a script that’s handed down. It’s the feeling you get when you’re finally, authentically okay. If that feeling comes from ordering Chinese food and watching horror movies, then pass the dumplings and hail Satan! This it your communion.

A Menu of Alternative Rituals (Take What You Want, Leave the Rest)

You don’t have to invent from scratch. Think of this as a potluck where you only bring the dishes you actually like.

The Ritual of Unplugging: A sacred, tech free day. No performances for the family group chat. No comparing your inner reality to everyone else’s highlight reel. The silence is yours.

The Ritual of Sensual Pleasure: Make your environment a temple for your senses. Play music that moves you, not music you’re supposed to hear. Cook a meal that smells divine to you. Touch textures that feel good. This is devotion to your own aliveness.

The Ritual of Future Self Compassion: Write a letter to the you of next holiday season. What do you want to tell her you’ve learned? What do you hope for her? Seal it. Open it next year. This is faith in your own growth.

The Ritual of Gentle Movement: A walk where you notice nature. Stretching while listening to a funny podcast. Dancing in your kitchen. This isn’t about exercise; it’s about thanking your body for carrying you through the year and bringing it into the present moment.

The Ritual of Chosen Connection: A video call with one safe person. Delivering cookies to neighbors. Volunteering at an animal shelter. Connection that is active, chosen, and boundaried is infinitely more sacred than obligation.

If coming up with new rituals and traditions is not your strong suit, don’t worry, I gotchu! I have taken the liberty of creating a list of 50 rituals you can choose from to create new holiday traditions on your own terms. Click here to download the list and enjoy!

Your Nervous System as the Ultimate Spiritual Guide

Here’s your new spiritual practice: check in with your body. Does this (movie, meal, conversation, plan) make me feel tight or loose? Heavy or light? Dread or gentle anticipation?

Your nervous system isn’t an obstacle to your spiritual life. It’s the compass. A triggered body isn’t a sinful one; it’s a wise one saying, “This pattern is not safe.” A calm, regulated body isn’t a boring one; it’s a miracle saying, “We are safe enough to feel joy.”

Building a holiday around regulation isn’t less spiritual. It’s more. It’s honoring the divine that lives in your very biology.

This Isn’t a Replacement. It’s a Reclamation.

You’re not getting a cheap knock off of a “real” holiday. You are doing something more radical. You are defining the real thing for yourself.

The first year might feel weird, like breaking in new shoes. You might have moments of thinking,

“Is this allowed?” (Yes.)

“Does this count?” ( Also, yes.)

That’s just the old programming getting a much needed reboot. Gently close that tab.

You are not missing the point of the season. You are finally, blessedly, getting the holiday spirit you deserve: peace, connection to what matters, and rest. AND you’re just getting it in a package that doesn’t come with hidden explosives.

You get to decide what is holy and sacred now. And that decision, made from a place of self trust, is the most sacred ritual of all.

Your Next Step (If You Want One)

The work of moving from deconstruction to building something new is profound. It’s one thing to know what doesn’t work. It’s another to give yourself full permission to imagine and create what does.

If you’re ready to move beyond survival and start building a life, and a holiday season, that feels authentically and peacefully yours, I can help. We can explore what brings you a sense of sacred safety and craft a personal blueprint for the future.

If you’re ready to define your own rules, let’s talk. I offer free 20 minute consultations.

Click here to schedule your consult. You deserve a peace that is built for you, by you.

Don’t forget to check out my FREE download: The Reclaimed Hearth: 50 Rituals for The Holy Daze On Your Terms